Regarding the previous post

Yeah, I'll admit, I just read about 400 awesome things. That's all they had on the site so far. And man, my 5 were pretty lame.

So here are some better ones:

-The feeling you get in your stomach at the top of the roller coaster

-When you are immediately connected to a real person, and not a recording on the phone

-Pretending you're asleep and fooling the other person!

-Scraping just enough PB or mayo out of the jar to make a sandwich

Also, I decided it was my civic duty to share this with you, because it totally rocks!

Something Awesome

Postsecret just turned me onto this website 1,000 Awesome Things.

So far, I've only gotten through four of them, but I'm hooked. It's a great website to look at right around Thanksgiving, isn't it?

My fave so far: When your nose is dripping and someone hands you a tissue.

Well, I'd say I'm inspired.

Here are five things that I think are hella awesome. Let's see if they're on the list of 1,000 somewhere.

5. The moment when everything suddenly calms down. I'm thinking specifically of when I got off the train from Paris to Lisieux last year. Everything was so stressful, and then stepping onto the platform was like an instant calm. But this happens all the time! When you check off the last in a loooong series of To-Does at work, when you put the last dish on the drying rack or dishwasher, when the giant tidal wave hits the arc you made for 1 million citizens and everyone survives...you name it!

4. Finding a sweet bit of nostalgia. You know the kind, the one you had almost forgotten, then it comes into your mind but no one knows what the hell it is, and you can't explain it very well anyway, so you begin to think maybe you created it too, but then one day it up and slaps you in the face. That one. For me, it's finding Garfield's Halloween Adventure or Dr. Quandary's Island. I'm still looking for episodes of Baywatch that featured scary things like vampires and ghosts.

3. Families we make for ourselves.

2. Falling in love, and having that person love you the same way.

1. My all-time favorite feeling in the world: When you wake up and look at the alarm clock and realize you still have one hour to sleep. I actually used to beg someone I knew who worked overnights to call me at like 4am so I could wake up and then go back to sleep!

I was going to criticize 1,000 Awesome Things for being a bit overblown with the writing, but I'm realizing now that that's just a side effect of raving about things that make you feel good!

Why people scare me

I typed "is" into google today, hoping to ask the wise internet world if I could get away with dropping an apostrophe (which, I know, is sinful most of the time, but it turns out it was OK in this case).

The problem is that google predictor gave me this:



Yes, the volume of people who care so much about celebrity gossip is scary. But what's exponentially more horrifying to me is that 4 of the results question the sex organs of successful women.

Let's be clear: when people ask if Lady Gaga is a "hermaphrodite" (which, by the way, is a horribly offensive and inaccurate term) or if Wendy Williams is a man, they are specifically asking about what organs they have in their pants. No, people are not asking about their sexualities. They're not asking about their gender expressions, since both clearly express themselves as feminine. The people who ask these questions assume they have the right to know about these public figures' biology.

And why? Why should it matter to anyone? Lady Gaga is an incredibly talented, extremely successful pop artist. Wendy Williams is a well-known radio and TV personality who is also quite successful despite, or perhaps because of, her controversial brash reporting style.

These two women are powerful. They have notoriety because of what they do. Not because of their sex. I think this world would be a better place if these googlers would rephrase their searches. My suggestions:

-Is hermaphrodite an offensive term?
-What are the meanings of transvestite, transgender, transsexual, intersex, etc,?
-When is Lady Gaga's new CD coming out?
-What channel is Wendy Williams' show on?
-Is it OK to drop an apostrophe after a business name?

Basically, anything that actually educates us and doesn't feed into this inane obsession with celebrity lives and body parts. Or, you can read this article by Carrie Polansky that articulates part of the reason I felt so uncomfortable looking at the search prediction. It's because of this weird media storm that happened after a video of Lady Gaga in a short skirt was released. I think the genius of the article is that Carrie urges us not to care about the video or Gaga's alleged (not confirmed) response, but how incredibly disrespectful the coverage was.

Of course after I noticed what the predictions were for the word "is," I had to try some other ones.

Here's what I saw when I typed "why" (keyword Pakistani - this one is so terrifying I don't even know where to begin:



And here's the result for "what" (keyword strawberries - ...............?):


Seriously, people, seriously?

disheartened

corzine lost.

phillies lost.

equal rights in maine lost.

boo to this week.

<3

see more dog and puppy pictures

After a long, postless absence

I just want to say, I have the best friends in the world, who keep me very busy, and two exciting new jobs that give me lots of entertaining stories. Sorry for my absence, but I've really been livin' it up.

Camping v.2.0

I just got back from an awesome two-day camping extravaganza for Rachel's birthday. It rocked. There were ghost stories, swimming, barbecues, smores, and all around good times. My hoodie smells like the tent, and my water bottle still tastes like firewood. I couldn't be more satisfied. I hope Rach feels the same way!

OMFG

There's a new Quentin Tarantino movie. Brad Pitt is in it. It's about Nazi-occupied France. Holy. Eff.

Happiness is:

Camping with good friends and a firemaster:



And a friend getting a new kitten who is so adorable it's worth taking claritin every four hours for the next 15 years of your life:



:)

Anyone who reads this probably noticed I dropped off

mostly cause it's been a little strange to be back and I don't know where to start.

So I leave you with this hilarious baby...

Welcome to America.

Your tax return from 2007 is being audited and your cell phone service has been cut and you have a disgusting bill to worry about. You have to start paying your car and auto insurance retroactively as soon as possible. You have no health insurance. Being in your parents house makes you want to snack on processed junk food every thirty minutes. Your bedroom is le basard. You need work.

Though I feel so overwhelmed sometimes I can't think, it is way more satisfying than I imagined to see my friends, yellow school buses, grape jelly, Tapan and my family. I never noticed before how many American flags hang outside of houses or how many people wear fanny packs (thank you very much for that image, Chicago airport). It is good to be home, and I'm sure this debt/credit problem will be handled quickly.

Here's hoping.

Whelmed

Next week I'll be home.

Last week I felt like I wasn't ready. I don't think I realized how quickly the leaving part would sneak up on me.

This weekend I went to Jersey with Emilien and 40 people he works with. It was fun most of the time, but some of the time I felt like this huge awkward outsider imposter person. I don't feel much like going into it here on the interwebs, but it made me realize that, yeah, I'm a bit tired of being the foreigner. I'm excited to come home to my country, speak in my language with people who will understand my slang, cultural jokes, nostalgic references. And I'll get theirs.

This week I'm having goodbye dinners with my colleagues and my friends. It's such a strange, indescribable feeling that I have. All this month I've watched the lasts roll in. Last time I'll see Fabien, last concert in France, last book rental from the medi@theque, last Friday class, last vacances, last grocery shopping. Soon I'll have my last paycheck, last dinner with my friends, last hair wash under my two-minute long shower, last weekend in Paris, last look at French stars. What will the final footfall in France, just before I board the plane, feel like? What will happen in my stomach when I hear my final announcement in French, and this time understand every word?

And what will my life be like in a month? Will I still be able to watch French movies with no subtitles? Understand song lyrics? How long does it take to lose a language? Will I see my colleagues again someday? What if one day I call them on the phone and am not able to understand their French?

You can see I'm a ball of nerves and conflicting emotions. My solution? Take advantage of the last days of my contract. And hope that these lasts are only lasts for this period in my life. Someday I'll come back here and make all new firsts and lasts. There's no doubt in my mind.

Going to the aaaaaatlantic!

Yeah, that's right. To all my Jersey shore peeps out there, I'm going to send you a big fat wave from the other coast of our ocean. Saturday. If you live nearby and the weather's nice, I encourage you to go to the beach. I'll be at this beach, looking at this view (image here):



Technically, I'll be on the coast of the bay that empties (flows? runs? eff geography)into the Atlantic, but that's good enough for me. I mean, there are already something like 3900 kms separating me from the other coast; who am I to complain about the distance of a tiny bay too?

It's another two-week paid vacation and this time I'm not bored out of my mind. I've got a new friend with a motorcycle and a desire to show me cool things about France and French culture. My best friend here (who was away the last vacances) is staying in town and open to traveling with me (that's us in the photo on the beach at Trouville). And most importantly, I'm feeling the crunch. I know I've gotta see stuff, and I know I've gotta see it now. Because, though my heart tells me I'll be back to France many times, my brain and the economic crisis warns me that one is never sure, and that I need to seize the opportunity I have to see this country now, while the language is fresh and I've nothing else to do.

So, this weekend La Baule; next weekend...? I'm thinking Strasbourg or maybe Provence. I so would love to go there before I leave. The weekend after I'm going to Jersey! Dream fulfilled! The weekend after that I'll be in Paris. And the weekend after that...get ready...

Are you ready for this?

The weekend after that I'll be in New Jersey.

(I can't write anymore cause I'm too busy cleaning the pieces of my exploded head out of my keyboard.)

Fail

Well, I did decide to fail.

It's day four of the National Poetry Month poem-a-day challenge, and I've written exactly one so far. Last year I rocked it - thirty poems by the end of April - but this year I feel unmotivated. Also, my time in France is bittersweetly coming to an end, and I don't much feel like having a reminder of the time gone by every day. So I'm sitting this one out.

But you should go see what Rachel's been up to, cause it's awesome.

too tired for a real post

the chain letter said this comes from National Geographic's Best Photos of the Year, but the link I found has a whole different selection. Weird.

Something awesome happened

I checked out a book from the library. An anthology of the most beautiful french love poems. And I decided I didn't want to read it.

Why is that amazing?

I didn't give up because the language was too difficult. I didn't choose to read something in English or a little kids book instead. I simply didn't like what I was reading. I found it cliched. And do you know how? I could predict the lines that were coming next. Whoa. Not only was I able to read and comprehend the words, I was able to predict what French words were coming next. I'm able to recognize cliches in French now! Booyah!

In all seriousness though, this is a big moment. I've been reading in French for a while. Not fluently enough to tackle Le Monde, but substantial writing that hasn't been watered down for a foreigner. When I read the bilingual edition of Julien Green's The Language and Its Shadow I was able to read the English works in English and the French works in French, without using the translation as a clutch. I've been keeping a journal in French. I've even written (using very, very simple language) a poem in French.

I think I'll go to the beach this weekend with a much better anthology of contemporary French poetry to celebrate. If I don't profiter du soleil now, I'll never forgive myself.

PS - Not all the lines were horrible. I liked this one.

The most exciting thing that happened to me yesterday

I've just prepared my dinner (rice with black beans in a tomato onion sauce that will make you want to marry me) and am sitting down to eat. With a flick of my wrist, I knock over my American-sized cup of water - not one of those wimpy canteen glasses - all over the floor. It takes the entirety of my bath towel to sop up most of the fluid. I'm feeling pretty damn clumsy, and sad that no one is with me to make the Oh, Ashley remark. Also, I've been buying all of my water and feel that this is at least a sixty-five cent waste.

After I've hung my towel to dry, I sit down again to enjoy my meal. Within 45 seconds I've flipped my bowl upside down onto the floor and there is now splattered ricey beany sauce stretching almost to all four corners of my apartment. I ask myself what the hell my problem is. I have no answer. I do feel happy though, as I clean the resulting mess, that there's all that water on the floor to lift the stains.

Best Week Ever - London Edition

At long last, here are the highlights in slideshow format:

And some more highlights that aren't available in photo form:

-Conversations in French and in English with the students
-An awesome and hospitable host family
-Good times with colleagues
-Pubs
-The animatronic T-Rex at the Natural History Museum
-Reading Julien Green and learning that languages are hard for everyone, even people raise bilingually.

London Calling

So...I didn't want to blog it before 'cause I wasn't 100% sure it was gonna work out, but everything in in order now and I can finally tell you...

I'm going to London!

I'm chaperoning a group of advanced students on their school trip to London with other professors Philippe and Karen. We three profs will be staying together at one house, while groups of students will be staying with other families. During the days, I'll get to see all the touristy stuff that's designed for the kids' trip, and at nights I'll be partaking in the London nightlife. Maybe.

Many, many stories to come. But I don't think any of them are going to involve me receiving flowers from a London man, so I think Anita is gonna win. ;)

I guess this is kinda me, minus the last line.
more animals

Today is International Women's Day

If you want, you can go look at the official website.

I was more interested in looking at this one. After an attempt by about.com to name the top 100 women in history, and a spread in glamour magazine, Feministe invites its readers to submit the names of who would be on their lists. The user responses are great, and I'm finding out about a lot of incredible women by wiki-ing the names in the comments.

Who's on my list? My three favorite woman poets.

Lucille Clifton, Marie Howe, and Sharon Olds.

To celebrate women's day, I'm going to a free showing of a feminist film here in Lisieux. Then I'm going to continue my newest poetry project - working title Confessions from the fourth grade - cause it has a hell of a lot to do with the women who have had an effect on my life, whether they knew it or not.

UPDATE: The day actually falls on March 8th. My bad.